Baba Fakkad caught in the trap of friends

The outspoken Lala Ghumakkad
also lived in the same village where Fakkad Baba lived. People could recognise all the people living in that village by their names. No one knew when Fakkad would lose his mind. He was the same Mansookhi barber who had the mind to make a hole out of a hole, i.e. he could intimidate people and make them spill the beans. Mansookhi barber's shop was a kind of a hub for keeping track of the entire Panchayat. Now, talking about Lala Ghumakkad, as his name suggests, he would roam around the whole day. Wherever he would sit, it was impossible for people sitting there to leave easily. Ghumakkad always spoke Bhojpuri. People also liked his language. Fakkad's hangout was Mansoukhi barber's shop. Fakkad and Mansoukhi were talking to each other when they saw Banarasi from the neighboring village who was of Fakkad's age. Banarasi was accompanied by Ghumakkar. Fakkad called out to Baba Banarasi and signaled him to come towards him. Lala Ghumakkar also followed Banarasi.

Ghumakkar - Banarasi Bhai Ji, why is this Fakkadwa calling me?

Banarasi - Must be some work!

Ghumakkar - Baba has no work left, he keeps on talking all day at the barber's shop.

Banarasi - If only he had some work!

(They reached Fakkad while talking to each other)

Fakkar - Banarasi Bhai you are in great shape!!! Are you coming from your in-laws' place?

Banarasi- No friend, it's been past fifty now Fakkad Baba

Mansokhi- Hey, she must be having a sister-in-law!

Fakkar- Sister-in-law will not remain unmarried for Banarasi Bhai!

Banarasi- Hey, when I was of age, things were different, anyway Fakkad Baba had five wives.

Ghumakkar- So, you got Rahisan in dowry of the noble Baba.
Fakkar Baba's mind started getting disturbed and he started feeling happy.
Mansokhi- Fakkad Baba is an old player. Girls of the Panchayat used to get excited on seeing him.
Banarasi- Fakkad Baba, how many girls did you have affairs with?
Fakkar- Leave the old things friend.
Ghumakkar- Pinkiya's father used to worship him a lot in the middle of the road. What would you call a Fakkad like that?
Fakkar- Do you know that at that time Pinkiya used to love me a lot. I used to follow Rasgulla. I used to beat Pinkiya a lot from morning to evening. One day I went towards her house. Pinkiya was gesturing at me on the roof. I was out of my senses and I thought that she was saying that there is no one in the house. I was waiting for an opportunity so I went...
Ghumakkar- This bloody Baba Havan.
Fakkar- Don't be coy Lala, you eat hundred rotis the whole day and still you beg like a beggar.

Mansokhi- Hey wanderer brother, Fakkad Baba is telling his love story, don't interrupt him.

Banarasi- That's right. Anyway, who doesn't know Fakkad Baba? Even Langtu Mishra doesn't have as much respect as Fakkad Baba.

Mansokhi- Hey, Langtu Mishra doesn't know even half of the mantras Fakkad Baba knows. Fakkad Baba doesn't talk nonsense, otherwise he would have stayed at our shop. Fakkad Baba, what happened after that?

(Now everyone starts offering prayers to Fakkad)

Fakkar- What happened, bastards? I got beaten up because of you people.

Mansokhi- What are you saying Fakkad Bhai because of us! Fakkad- Do you know what happened after that (Fakkad calmly) what did we do! Went to Pinkiya's house and then knocked the door softly so that no one could hear, brother, at that time it was not like today, it was openly done.

Mansokhi- That's right, nowadays there is nudity, at that time the fun of loving secretly was something else.

Ghumakkad- After that, what happened Fakkadva?

Fakkad- What happened Laala, I was happy in my heart but what happened was that as soon as the door opened, I saw her father who was seven feet tall and broad built. My heart was happy as soon as I saw her father Laala, now my love has started to fade.
Ghumakkad- I can't pee on seeing her father! Fakkad- Understand that I had just peed, wanderer Lala.

Mansoukhi- Hey wanderer Lala, Fakkad Baba was not weak, yes it is a different thing that if you were there, you would have defecated.

Fakkad- As soon as I saw her father in front of me, I tried to run away, but her father ran after me. I stopped after running for some distance, and when I looked back, her father was standing near my head. Pinkiya's father held my collar and made me stand like a dog is made to stand by holding its ears. I was torn with pain, then he said that this is an area of gentlemen, if I see you again, I will break your hands and legs and put you in front of you. The bastard pushed me from behind so hard that I was thrown ten feet away. After that he started going back.

Mansokhi- It was very wrong, Fakkad bhai, you did not eat or drink anything, you broke a glass worth twelve annas.

Banarasi- Yes brother, this is what happened, if I were here, I would have cursed you to my heart's content.

Ghumakkar- I would have stayed here! I would have kicked you a hundred times but Fakkad did play.

Fakkar- While leaving, he kept on saying the same catchphrase, Mohalla of gentlemen, Mohalla of gentlemen.

Ghumakkar- Thank God Fakkad left Delhi at that point.

(Fakkar said while twisting his body)

Fakkar- Oh, what am I less.... As soon as his father went some distance, I said loudly, even dogs have their own mohalla, uncle.

Mansokhi- Oh my God, then...

Fakkar- What is it, as soon as I said this, he started chasing me. I was ahead, he was behind, he was behind, I was ahead. In the end the bastard caught me, he beat me so much that he didn't even leave me in a condition to walk.
Mansokhi- He beat me and made my face look like a Baba, understand Banarasi brother

Fakkad- He did not come out of the house for a week, Bau Maai kept asking who hit him? Why did he hit him? We did not even utter a word.

Hearing this, everyone started laughing loudly.

Fakkad- After getting kicked by brother during the day, Pinkiya's father started coming in my dreams even at night (patting his head)

Ghumakkar- I know, I feel that he was in good health and did not come in my sleep.

Mansukhi- Ok, tell me one thing Fakkad bhai, did you meet Pinkiya again or not (hitting the pot)

Fakkad- No... no, even during the day, as soon as I saw Pinkiya, I used to see her father (abusing)

Banarasi- That is why we say that when you eat the fruit when it is ripe, you get its pleasure, eating it raw means getting cheated.

Mansukhi- This is what you want to say, right? That Baba got fooled Banarasi bhai

Banarasi- What else, when his father came to know about it, he gave the responsibility of his marriage to his uncle. Fakkad baba forgot Pinkiya, he got a beautiful sister-in-law

(Fakkar raises his voice as soon as he hears about sister-in-law)

Fakkar- Oh, to hell with the sister-in-law. I was so foolish that I got married because of my uncle.

Mansukhi: Uncle, it was not your marriage, it was a conspiracy, I remember it very well.

(Fakkar claps happily and says)

Fakkar: At the time of marriage, uncle said that you have seven sisters-in-law. I was also very happy, I was crazy about it, but uncle trapped me.

Mansukhi: Uncle is like this.

Fakkar: I had asked for a Hero Honda car in dowry, then my uncle said that you don't earn, from where will you fill the fuel? Buy Hero Jet... it runs without fuel, as long as it has power, it will keep running forever.

Mansukhi: Oh yes... you were not eating Khichdi in the mandap... because of the car.

Fakkad- yes that is it, I could not understand what Fufaa was saying, at that time the name of the cycle was Hero Jet, I could not understand the difference between Hero Honda and Hero Jet, I said whatever Fufaa said. All of them conspired together.

Mansukhi- it is very bad Fakkad bhai, even the universe is of no use in front of father

Fakkad- while eating khichdi, my father in law was standing the Hero Jet cycle in such a way and twisting his moustache as if he has given me a Bullet

Mansukhi- Fufaa sahiye had said that as long as I have breath, it will keep running forever

Ghumkkad- keep burning in the fire of youth, Fufaa, I have given you both the cars without oil in Delhi. As long as I have breath, it will keep running forever. You will be worn out by keeping me going, baba

In this way, Fakkad narrates the first love story of his life with great interest. Actually, Fakkad got a husband who was contrary to his thinking. Instead of fun, he got punishment. Fakkad's father-in-law died untimely, then Fakkad Baba took the responsibility of getting all his sisters-in-law married, and he fulfilled it. Fakkad Baba was a pure hearted person, whatever he had to say, he would say it clearly without worrying about the words before and after.

Note - All pictures have been taken from Google